Selfalot

Daily Quote: “If there is something to gain and nothing to lose by asking, by all means ask!” W. Clement Stone

It’s difficult for most of us to ask for help. We anticipate that our request for help will be denied and we expect that we will be rejected. To avoid the pain of this rejection we prefer not to ask.

Here are five ways to make asking for help so much easier. It will be worth your while to make a note of these tips when needing to ask for help. Being able to ask for help will make your life so much easier to navigate.

Tip 1. Ask as if you expect to get your help. A positive mind will help you ask with greater confidence. You expect this help, you deserve to get help and the person you are asking is only too happy to help. In fact they truly want to help you.

There is no difference between the two ways of asking as you could have the same outcome either way. You don’t expect to be helped or you do. However, it will make your approach much friendlier, your mood so much lighter that you will cope with the whole process a lot better. Even if you get a no, you won’t feel the rejection as much.

Tip 2. Assume you can. Don’t put out negativity into the universe. You will have a greater chance of finding a parking spot if you assume you will get one, than if you assume you won’t. Assume you will get a ticket to a show, a scholarship, a raise or the job. Assume the best for yourself and more often than not you will receive it.

Tip 3. Ask someone who can give it to you. Find out who is the right person by asking for this information. Who can provide me with the answer, who is the person in charge or who would I need to speak to in order to…? Do a bit of research to discover who the right person or organisation to provide you with the help you need. Asking the right person will contribute hugely to your success.

Tip 4. Be clear and specific. When asking for help identify first of all what you need help with. Do you need help with money and if yes, how much exactly do you need? Do you need advice? Then determine what the advice is for and what advice you need to answer your question.

If you are asking for a raise you need to be able to state what that raise is. How much is it for, what benefits over and above the raise are you expecting and when is this raise due? If you are looking for a job, you need to decide exactly what you are looking for so that you can apply to the relevant positions.

We tend to find it easy to ask for smaller things. If we need a baby sitter we know exactly for what date and time you need a person to look after your children. It’s the bigger items that we want to go for that we find difficult to identify. It’s probably because we don’t feel that we deserve the big house, or the large raise or the promotion. So we find it difficult to ask for these specifically.

Tip 5. Ask repeatedly. One of the most important principles of success is persistence. Don’t give up. Whenever you ask people to help you work on your goal you will have some people that are going to say no. They might have other priorities, commitments and other reasons why they cannot help you. It’s not a reflection on you.

Try and get used to the idea that you will have some rejections along the way. Not everybody will be the right person to ask or will have the time to spend with you. That does not mean that you are not worthy of this help. It just means it’s not the right person for you at this moment in time. Carry on asking. You will get the help you need.