Selfalot

Many people find themselves in similar situations all their lives. They are stuck in an endless loop of reinforcing behaviour patterns. These can be in their relationships, careers or personal circumstances.

At times wanting a sabbatical reveals you are discontent in your current role. So getting one may depend on how powerful a player you are in your organisation. If you are highly valued, an employer is more likely to agree to your request. If you are a lesser player, you are taking a very big gamble unless there’s a precedent in place.

You could find yourself in one of these as well. If you are constantly battling to lose weight you will understand this and recognise the cycle that you are in. You get enthusiastic when you find a new diet. Somebody you know has lost tons of weight. You jump to it with great gusto.

After a month you start slipping back into the same bad habits. You are back to having just the one donut with your coffee. Then you add your potatoes back at dinner time and so it goes on. Within a short period of time you are back to eating what you did before. You are unable to get out of those behaviour patterns.

What about your relationships? Do you pick the same abusive partner and don’t want to leave because you can’t cope with life on your own? Or what about that new job you took? Is it like all the others or are you challenging yourself?

It’s not only the behaviour patterns that are keeping you back. It’s also the fact that you constantly focus your attention on how bad your life is that could add to the situation. You hate your body size and you never step in front of a mirror. It’s just too awful.

Yet you constantly have the picture in your mind as to how awful you feel about yourself. So your attention is constantly on the negative image that you carry around with yourself. This reinforces your behaviour and keeps you on the same treadmill never able to jump off.

Step away from this. Start replacing those negative images of yourself with positive ones. Change the way you see yourself. Instead of thinking about how gross your weight is think rather of how wonderful it feels to have attained a good weight for yourself.

Do this even without adding a starvation diet. Focus on the happiness you will feel when you fit into a smaller size outfit. See yourself happily coping in that promotion you received at work. Watch yourself walking down the aisle with your new partner.

Imagine if you can think that you are a successful dieter that you can knock those pounds off. You will be able to approach a healthy eating lifestyle with greater confidence than if you already approach your new goal of losing weight with the idea that you have failed in all previous diet programs so why would this one be any different.

It makes so much sense to change ones mindset to a more positive one and to try and step off the treadmill of constant negative thinking and limiting self belief. Yet when we write down our goals we do not plan any time spent on changing our thought patterns.

As with all elements of your life, changing your thought patterns can be done. It just requires effort and focus. Everything we think and do stems from learned behaviour. We are not automatically negative thinkers. We can learn to be positive and view our reality with the certainty of being able to succeed.